When Rev. Herb and Rev. Paula Frost met through the Navigators campus ministry in college, they had no idea how deeply intertwined their paths in ministry, marriage, and mission would become. Today, Herb serves as executive minister of Serve Clergy, one of the Covenant Church’s five mission priorities. Paula provides coaching and spiritual direction to clergy across the denomination. Together, they embody what it means to serve side by side.
Their story begins with shared training. Though they attended different colleges in different states, both were invited to lead and train for ministry with the Navigators. Within a year of meeting, they were married and serving together on campus at the University of Massachusetts at Amherst. Later, they launched a Navigators chapter at Boston University and eventually ministered to cadets at the U.S. Coast Guard Academy.
Their introduction to the Covenant came somewhat unexpectedly. When Paula gave birth to their first child in Boston, her midwife turned out to be married to a local Covenant pastor. At Trinity Covenant Church in Lexington, Massachusetts, the Frosts found their spiritual home. “We just loved the spirit of the Covenant,” Paula recalls.
Though their early ministry days were collaborative, their official titles didn’t always reflect that. “We functioned in many ways as copastors, but that wasn’t a model many congregations were ready to accept at that time,” Paula explains. She took on leadership in children, family, and intergenerational ministry—roles she held in each of their church placements across four different conferences.
When Herb transitioned into his current national role with Serve Clergy, the couple made a mutual decision: they would both step out of local church ministry. “The schedules wouldn’t have aligned in a healthy way,” Paula says. Instead, she leaned into her growing ministry as a spiritual director and began coaching training. Today, she coaches and provides spiritual direction for clergy and also serves on the Covenant’s interim children and family ministry team.
Paula’s journey to ordination was a long one. She began the process in 2008 after nearly a decade of local church ministry. She completed her seminary training alongside her spiritual direction certification, finally being ordained in 2016. “I didn’t want to cut corners,” she says. “I wanted to do the work, to be fully formed, and to show I wasn’t just winging it.”
Herb affirms the strength of their partnership, especially in how their gifts complement one another. “Paula is great with details—especially remembering names. I rely on her for that,” he says. “She also brings a creative, storytelling lens to our work. Our congregations have benefited from hearing both our voices.”
Their spiritual rhythms have also been shaped by Paula’s formation in contemplative practices. Herb credits her with helping lead churches into deeper spiritual spaces, including centering prayer and reflective exercises. “Doing that together has shaped both our ministry and our own journeys,” he says.
Of course, balancing ministry and marriage hasn’t always been easy. During their years serving local churches, raising children meant constantly coordinating schedules and tag-teaming commitments. “Family dinners were nonnegotiable,” Paula says. “Even if it was at 8 p.m., we were eating together.”
Now, as empty nesters, they’re learning new rhythms. Herb structures his week into twenty-one time blocks—morning, afternoon, and evening each day—and tries not to work more than five blocks in a row. “If I do, I know I need to take a break,” he says.
Both acknowledge that ministry time can easily blur with personal time. “Sometimes we do great with boundaries,” Paula admits. “Other times we run low on margin. That’s when we need to step back and make space.”
They also reflect on the challenges of being a clergy couple. “Herb has never had people walk out when he’s preaching or leave church because they saw a woman at the communion table,” Paula notes. “I have. So that pain has become part of his story too.”
Herb went through his own journey to fully embrace egalitarian theology. “If I had it to do over again, I would’ve said, ‘Paula, let’s figure out how to do seminary at the same time so that we come out prepared at the same time,’” he says.
Despite the denomination’s affirmation that women are called and gifted in ministry, the Frosts have seen how that affirmation does not always play out in practice. “There are still people who treat female pastors as ‘less than,’” Paula says. “I want women in ministry to know we are for you. When Herb advocates in his role, he carries my voice with him.”
Paula is also passionate about elevating children and family ministry as a meaningful call. “If you’re called to that space, then step in wholeheartedly,” she urges. “But lead pastors need to give those leaders a voice and a seat at the table. The old mindset that they don’t belong there doesn’t work anymore.”
When asked what they hope people remember about them, their answers reflect their deep partnership and pastoral heart.
“A healthy marriage and the kingdom of God go hand in hand,” says Herb. “Neither is more important, and each strengthens the other.”
Paula adds, “We didn’t sacrifice our family for ministry. We did ask each other—and our kids—to make sacrifices. But that’s part of discipleship. Christ is at the center, not us. We love people. And I hope anyone who’s crossed paths with us has felt seen, heard, and that they belong.”
